Writings

Unrecognized offerings from your heart
Worse yet,
Your offering claimed as someone else’s
Your compassionate gesture
So desperately needed
And so hard to give
Conjured up from the depth of your soul
Given freely
Only to reach the receiver
Masked in the hands of someone else

Don’t stop. Stay open.
Continue to give yourself freely
Even in the face of fraud
The Beloved within us knows
And your love gesture will be carried
On whispers of her wind
Into the hearts of who it is meant

I choose boundlessness over security
Love over convention
passion over pragmatism
truth over peace (because real truth brings the deepest peace)
I choose growth over comfort
faith over fear
instability over imprisonment
messy fights over quiet suffering
risking it all over wondering what could have been
I choose fumbling around trying to hear the voice of the Beloved speaking to me over pushing Her to silence because what she’s whispering seems impossible.
I choose freedom above all else.
freedom to try my best and fail
freedom to start all over again
freedom to stay the course
freedom to find my own soul path in this lifetime.
without this freedom we have nothing
and without this freedom we have nothing to give
Freedom above all else.

Clearing the mist of the misconception of separateness
Piercing the shadowy vail cast by fear
The path of awakening is not a straight line
The experience of relaxing into the truth of what is becomes the Shakti presence
The feminine path of freedom
Not letting go of anything
Letting go into everything

I listened to a podcast the other day where Caroline Myss discussed the courage to combat evil. She described evil as being “the absence of grace” and moments when we consciously choose to disconnect from our conscience. I understand this to be when we let our choices and actions be driven by fear, rather than from an intent to do harm. Spiritual work/light work/love work requires that we have faith and trust in something bigger than us and that takes immense courage. It’s not for the faint of heart. She goes on to say that one of the reasons we have such a hard time having faith in something bigger is because we don’t have faith or trust in ourselves. Faith is something that is built from the inside out. Not something we get by projecting it out into the world with spiritual showmanship or bypassing. We build trust in ourselves by upholding virtues. Virtues like trust, dignity, self-respect and respect for others are REAL and they are the structures that uphold the benevolence of the universe. If we can cultivate real faith and trust in ourselves by acting in ways that are connected to our conscience, we can begin to trust the goodness of the universe. Upholding a virtue may perhaps be one of the most courageous acts of love. If we are to be true holy men and holy women we must develop ourselves into instruments of courage and release our fear of being out of control. It’s from these courageous acts that we create more love and free ourselves and one another from suffering. It ain’t easy but this a true path of love and devotion.

Yoga has never been just about our relationship with ourselves. It is about our connection with our Self as much as it is about relationships and the ability to connect and reflect with others and the world. When we isolate ourselves so much that we just exist inside our own “practice” we detach from the greater Reality and are subject to operate under our own personal version of what is real rather than opening to other perspectives and the divine reflection of others.

It’s one of these sneaky ways the ego hijacks the driver’s seat – not wanting to hear what others have to say – and hides under the disguise of things like martyrdom and unconditional love. We can trick ourselves to believing that because we are yogis or meditators or spiritual practitioners, we know Truth and hide away within our own minds instead of leaning into the support of friends, family and the wisdom of ancient traditions and technologies like yoga to help give us the full picture.

This isolated way of operating is super dangerous because we thrust ourselves right into the nasty position of playing god (one of the many forms of spiritual bypassing), thinking we know best and then we step into the world driven by an opinion that is isolated from the bigger picture, not connected. And this is the absolute opposite of yoga, union. So may we lean into the support around us . May we have the courage to ask for help and reflection. And may we have the open mind to really listen. May we become a part of the greater whole rather than building walls around us and keeping our hearts in a cage.

Yoga has never been just about our relationship with ourselves. It is about our connection with our Self as much as it is about relationship and the ability to connect and reflect with others and the world.

I’m bored.
Bored of being told my instincts are off
Bored of trying to keep up with a cadence that exhausts me
Bored of being busy under the guise of productivity

I’m uninterested in the newest version of global distraction.
I’m disenchanted by the same storylines playing out under different masks
I’m bored of watching smart people get caught in an age old drama thinking it is something new.
I’m exhausted of being told I’m not enough and trying to remember it’s a lie.
I’m tired of trying to fill a void that doesn’t even exist.
I’m over the notion that if I do what is right for me it will hurt the people I love.
I’m bored of having such low expectations of our emotional intelligence and grace.

What I AM interested in is remembering who I was before the world told me who I should be.
In disentangling myself from the notion of accomplishment as a measure of success
I’m inspired to strengthen my intuition as my ultimate compass
I’m excited to explore my full humanity
And eager to leave the fear of messing up by the wayside
I’m interested in returning to my own unique rhythm
In knowing my instinctual nature is the truest expression of God’s love coursing through me.